why oh why??!

View previous topic View next topic Go down

why oh why??!

Post by Courtnut on Sat Mar 19, 2011 3:50 am

So I am wondering why girls like to get knocked up on purpose with a guy that's a huge douchebag? When you already have 2 kids that he treats like crap? A guy you have a protective order against, and are divorcing but decide to have another kid?
What are your guys' views on this?
avatar
Courtnut

Posts : 368
Join date : 2010-05-22
Age : 27
Location : Sandy, UT

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: why oh why??!

Post by Rex on Sat Mar 19, 2011 6:11 am

Some woman try to use pregnancy as a way to solve their problems. It's weird but sadly it happens
avatar
Rex
Leliel
Leliel

Posts : 2841
Join date : 2010-05-16
Age : 105
Location : 51°10′44″N 1°49′34″W

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: why oh why??!

Post by Hannah_Banana222 on Sat Mar 19, 2011 8:07 am

Wow. Sounds like my mama. Only she didn't do it on purpose. And she's not divorcing the douche. But yeah...

Sounds like a personal problem? You wanna talk? Smile
avatar
Hannah_Banana222
Surprise Me
Surprise Me

Posts : 2984
Join date : 2010-05-15
Age : 23
Location : Colton, CA

View user profile http://hannahlynneschuster.wordpress.com

Back to top Go down

Re: why oh why??!

Post by xChorusOfAngelsx on Sat Mar 19, 2011 4:20 pm

Well the type of person you're referring to probably struggles with self esteem issues. They may believe that if they don't make it work with the douchebag they have, they'll be alone forever. It's all psychological. For some reason people are scared of bring single, those in the 27-30 age range mostly I've noticed. Especially women, they get desperate for some reason and settle for the first asshole they come into contact with. Just happened with a friend of my boyfriend.

And as for the kid thing, they're living in fairytale land and believe a baby will change a man. That its going flip a switch in his head and make him be a better person. What they don't understand is that the dickhead has to want to change. Same deal with a drug addict, you can throw them in rehab, but if they want to continue using, they're going to. Getting pregnant could also be a desperate attempt to save a relationship.

Whatever the situation, this person is nuts.

_________________


"Open your mind before your mouth." - Motionless in White
Book-face.
Follow me on Instagram!
avatar
xChorusOfAngelsx
Music Freak

Posts : 1392
Join date : 2010-05-15
Age : 28
Location : New York (No, not the damn city)

View user profile http://www.instagram.com/snakebitess

Back to top Go down

Re: why oh why??!

Post by Courtnut on Sun Mar 20, 2011 10:07 pm

Yes, it is very personal because I am referring to my sister. The problem is, is that she knows he will not change because of the kids she already has. He still says they are not his, and the oldest just turned 3 and looks exactly like him. He also wants her to have an abortion with this one. And also says this one isn't his.
She just barely got a waitress job, her kid I pretty much raised until she lost her job got totally out of control after being with her and was totally screwed up and still is because of her and her husband. He is now the worst kid I've ever dealt with. And she treats him like a beast, and treats her 17-month daughter like a princess. She is on food stamps and WIC, can't even handle the two she has and we have them almost every day and night of the week again. And she goes and gets her IUD taken out and get's pregnant. While they are separated I mean duhhh!! She needed to help her son out before having another kid. I love him so much and she is screwing him up and ruined all of the progress I made with him and it's making me crazy she is going to do this to yet another helpless kid.
It is not fair that kids have absolutely no say in what their parents decide for them. Their lives are being chosen to be screwed up and it's stupid.
Sorry, needed to vent.

I also admit I am really bitter and jealous towards her after TTC for 3 1/2 years with 5 losses. And she's had her 3 pregnancies in the time that I've been trying with a non-douchebag! It's not fair. 3 kids under the age of 3 1/2 I'm going to have to pretty much raise but no matter what at the end of the day I have to say they are her kids... I am so done with this. Did I mention I was never once paid for these almost 3 years of my life 18 hours+ a day? Yeah.
I feel like I am the only one who thinks my sister is COMPLETELY f*cking nuts!!! santa
avatar
Courtnut

Posts : 368
Join date : 2010-05-22
Age : 27
Location : Sandy, UT

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: why oh why??!

Post by Hannah_Banana222 on Sun Mar 20, 2011 10:48 pm

Wow... That's not cool. I feel so bad for your poor sister. Of course, it is her fault, but it's definitely a hard situation. I'll be praying for her and her children. Smile

I think you need to have a heart-to-heart with her. Maybe this could be the little miracle you've been hoping for. I know you're so discouraged by your infertility, but have you considered adoption? If your sister is as bad a parent as you say, she really shouldn't be keeping this new kid. Just think about it. Maybe you can take this one. Very Happy
avatar
Hannah_Banana222
Surprise Me
Surprise Me

Posts : 2984
Join date : 2010-05-15
Age : 23
Location : Colton, CA

View user profile http://hannahlynneschuster.wordpress.com

Back to top Go down

Re: why oh why??!

Post by Courtnut on Sun Mar 20, 2011 11:18 pm

Haha yeah she would never go for it. I used to feel bad for her, but after all of these years she's just annoying. It isn't just about her, she doesn't realize that. She is putting herself and her kids in harms way, which is so not cool with me. If a man ever threatened to kill my kids, my family or me you can bet I would NEVER see him again.
I am not all that discouraged. I had 2 pregnancies with heartbeats last year, even though they didn't last it gives me hope that they are developing to that point. I get pregnant every 5 to 6 months, so I am about due for another one.
I love adoption, after giving my baby up I decided I will adopt one day. I would do it in a heartbeat. But coming up with the 50 grandish will not happen for awhile. And quite frankly I am not that patient. I might foster and adopt that way, but that's also a long expensive process.
avatar
Courtnut

Posts : 368
Join date : 2010-05-22
Age : 27
Location : Sandy, UT

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: why oh why??!

Post by Hannah_Banana222 on Mon Mar 21, 2011 12:22 am

Well that sucks. Sad

Woah. Is it really that expensive? Why?
avatar
Hannah_Banana222
Surprise Me
Surprise Me

Posts : 2984
Join date : 2010-05-15
Age : 23
Location : Colton, CA

View user profile http://hannahlynneschuster.wordpress.com

Back to top Go down

Re: why oh why??!

Post by Courtnut on Mon Mar 21, 2011 10:07 am

That's how much my husbands aunts two adoptions were. I mean plenty of people want to adopt and can afford to raise a child, but can't come up with that kind of money.
avatar
Courtnut

Posts : 368
Join date : 2010-05-22
Age : 27
Location : Sandy, UT

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: why oh why??!

Post by Hannah_Banana222 on Mon Mar 21, 2011 11:00 am

Does it still cost that if you adopt a baby you already know?
avatar
Hannah_Banana222
Surprise Me
Surprise Me

Posts : 2984
Join date : 2010-05-15
Age : 23
Location : Colton, CA

View user profile http://hannahlynneschuster.wordpress.com

Back to top Go down

Re: why oh why??!

Post by xChorusOfAngelsx on Mon Mar 21, 2011 10:52 pm

Where did your husband's aunt adopt from? That's definitely the high end of adoption costs. If you adopt directly from the foster care system it's much, much cheaper than from a private agency.

Here's a handy site one of my professors had my class poke around on:
http://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/s_cost/s_cost.cfm

_________________


"Open your mind before your mouth." - Motionless in White
Book-face.
Follow me on Instagram!
avatar
xChorusOfAngelsx
Music Freak

Posts : 1392
Join date : 2010-05-15
Age : 28
Location : New York (No, not the damn city)

View user profile http://www.instagram.com/snakebitess

Back to top Go down

Re: why oh why??!

Post by Courtnut on Tue Mar 22, 2011 5:56 pm

From Texas. Well I am having very mixed emotions today. My sister had her appointment and I guess the baby died a couple weeks ago. I am kind of relieved, but feel bad for her at the same time. She always was the one telling me to get over mine. And I am somehow okay with her knowing the real pain of miscarriage. She actually told me I am selfish because I keep killing my babies. And that I am too fat to ever carry a baby to term.
So I am kind of having a hard time feeling that bad for her. Does that make me a bad person?
avatar
Courtnut

Posts : 368
Join date : 2010-05-22
Age : 27
Location : Sandy, UT

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: why oh why??!

Post by xChorusOfAngelsx on Tue Mar 22, 2011 7:47 pm

I'm guessing a private agency in Texas. Definitely look around for other options.

Too fat to carry a baby to term? My cousin carried three babies to term when she was well over 300 pounds before her weight loss surgery. Probably actually closer to 400. Two of her kids are twins. I doubt your weight has anything to do with it.

Honestly, I probably wouldn't feel bad for her either. If she was an insensitive bitch to you, hey. Karma.

I'm assuming you've been to a doctor. Why does your uterus hate you? If you don't mind me asking.

_________________


"Open your mind before your mouth." - Motionless in White
Book-face.
Follow me on Instagram!
avatar
xChorusOfAngelsx
Music Freak

Posts : 1392
Join date : 2010-05-15
Age : 28
Location : New York (No, not the damn city)

View user profile http://www.instagram.com/snakebitess

Back to top Go down

Re: why oh why??!

Post by Courtnut on Wed Mar 23, 2011 9:54 pm

I've been to a doctor with my last miscarriage in October and I did have low progesterone but he wants me tested for other things but I can't because I don't have insurance now. I'll hopefully find out why my uterus hates me Haha. I really want it to happen this month because it's our last chance to have a baby before the end of the year.
As for my sister, I am annoyed because my dad went over to watch her kids for her but the day after my miscarriage I had ti watch her kids and no one would help me even though I was on pelvic rest. And everyone keeps telling her how sorry they are but not one person told me sorry with either 5 of mine. I got almost no sympathy. When at the end of the day I have empty arms and she at least has her kids to feel blessed.
They actually adopted through agencies which are usually more expensive than private. And as for being too fat I've never been even close to 200 pounds I highly doubt that's it. When she told me I killed my babies I cried all day considering I was already having issues with that.
avatar
Courtnut

Posts : 368
Join date : 2010-05-22
Age : 27
Location : Sandy, UT

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: why oh why??!

Post by Sponsored content


Sponsored content


Back to top Go down

View previous topic View next topic Back to top


 
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum